Why I Blog

Jan 11 2012

Why I Blog

By Chad and has 10 comments.

Rewind: Minus the very last comment, this is one reason I blog (from Seth Godin & Tom Peters)…

Thoughts? Love to hear your feedback? Have you ever thought about blogging as a way to grow personally? Become more self-aware? Be a better writer?

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Jan 02 2012

8 Things I Learned About Twitter, FB & Blogging Over Coffee With a BIG Blogger

By Chad and has 1 comment.

Big This was a popular post from earlier in the year…. ScottWilliams has been blogging for a few years now at BigIsTheNewSmall.com and influences thousands of people daily through social media, taking full advantage of the Power of the Social Media Tongue. He reached out to me personally last week over coffee in Oklahoma City. We both work with LifeChurch.tv in different cities and have a lot in common, especially a love for swankified coffee joints like @vintagecoffeeok.

After hanging out, here is what Scott posted on Twitter that day: Had a great time over coffee w/ @chadmissildine, he’s a sharp leader, great thinker, & has a passion 4 reaching people 4 Jesus. Follow him! Wow, nice. I recently had the opportunity to write on leadership as a guest blogger at BigIsTheNewSmall: Want To Lead? Prove It! Check it out if you are looking for leaders in your organization or seeking a higher level of leadership for yourself.

Here are 8 things I learned about Twitter, FB & Blogging Over Coffee With a BIG Blogger:

1. It’s all about relationships. Just by spending time with me, Scott showed us that relationships are vital in Social Media (hence the “social” in social media). We talked about life, diversity in the church, culture, family and social media. He asked questions about the LifeChurch.tv Fort Worth campus and showed a true interest in me as an individual. You don’t have to take people to coffee, but you can do simple things to engage with others online!

2. Let writing fit into the flow of life. Scott talked about allowing social media to fit within the currents of life. Allow people in on the big things and little things. When you have a thought and a moment to share it, share it. Be careful with the time that you spend. Allow writing to fit into the flow of life baby!

3. Titles are important. When posting links to blogs on FB or Twitter, titles are SO important. A great post is nothing with a boring title. This post could have been titled, “Being a better blogger” but that wouldn’t be very compelling now would it? In the ad world, headlines contribute to approximatley 90% of an ad’s effectiveness. The same is true for social media. Titles are huge.

4. Find your Rhythmn. Linking to posts throughout the day is good, but don’t wear people out. Scott likes to post one link to his blog early in the mornings when people are up browsing, another around lunch time, one around dinner and another before bed. Check out Twitterblogology and the Twitter Effect on Blogging for great Twitter Tips.

5. Manage your time: jot notes when you have a creative thought. Finding a place to capture creative ideas when they arise will allow you to build a “bank” of topics to develop. When you do finally sit down to post, you’ll have a wealth of info to dig through. I use Dragon Dictation, which allows me to speak thoughts and ideas in my iPhone and send them to myself. I also like to use the simple note pad on my iPhone (when I’m not driving)!

6. Develop Consistency. One analogy Scott used: If a newspaper company decided to deliver its papers whenever it felt like it (one on Mondays, another on Fridays, etc.), they probably wouldn’t develop consistent readers. Blogging is the same way. The degree to which one is consistent will determine how much one is consistently read.

7. Community Involvement is huge (much like Scott’s hair). I think the mayor in OKC had Scott’s cell number. The week we hung out, he was up at the Oklahoma State Capitol helping out the Senate. Scott also talked about trying to be more involved in local Tweetups and gatherings in the future. It was a reminder to me to always give back to the local community, and to build relationships with leaders in the community.

8. Be yourself. Don’t try to be someone else. You will dig: The Lost Art of Authenticity, Even on Twitter & Facebook. Don’t try too hard, just be who you were created to be and help other people as much as you can.

What other big social media lessons have you learned from bloggers like Scott Williams? What are your favorite social media blogs? We would love to hear! To hear more on social media and social good, subscribe for email updates HERE.

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Dec 22 2011

The 3 P’s of Online Ministry

By Chad and has 4 comments.

I am no expert at online ministry but have learned a ton over the last year or so about helping people online. I’ve been able to help a lot of people through the use of social media tools like Facebook, Twitter and this blog, TheWayItCouldBe.com (12,000 pages viewed in May). I say that not in pride, but in a way that tries to say, “Hey, I’m just a normal dude sharing his life online, inviting others to do the same.”

I put together a few thoughts that may help you as you develop your own personal online ministry. By ministry, I simply mean helping people. This can come in the form of meeting needs, publishing helpful content, sharing content, developing supportive relationships, or a variety of other things. Your specific focus helping people will depend on how you are wired (where you are gifted).

I thought about the 3 P’s of a Personal Online Ministry: Presence, Partnership & Prayer. Whether you are new to the social media game or a long time guru, perhaps the 3 P’s will help you as you help others around the world. Let me unpack:

Presence. Developing an Online Ministry is impossible unless you are not…present. Social Media presence simply put, is built by sharing your life online. You realize that you can have global influence from wherever you are on the globe. Whether through FB, Twitter and/or a blog, being active is the name of the game in bulding an online presence. Presence will give you the permission to speak into others lives.

You don’t have to post something 20 times a day, but it is important that you develop a rhythmn and a consistency with what you post (more on rhythm and consistency). Helpful, relevant content will develop trust over time. Trust is what allows you to gain influence in the lives of others!

Partnership. By partnership I mean this: you can develop a personal online ministry, but if you are not networked and partnered with the right groups of people, your impact will be limited to what you can do personally. You will only be able to write so much, minister so much, respond so much. You need an arsenal of partners to help you have an impact. I would say that I am partnered up with LifeChurch.tv in Fort Worth, Texas and around the world through Church Online. When people have needs, I can lift them up to the LifeChurch.tv community.

Another way to “partner” is to share relevant content from other individuals you respect. Some bloggers (and those you follow on FB or Twitter) put out tremendous content that can help those you are networked with. Sharing their content can have tremendous impact on others (You can share this post by retweeting or posting it on your FB page).

Prayer. Prayer is the fuel behind your online ministry. It obviously guides and fills you in so many ways! Prayer fills your heart and mind in a way that allows you to give what is inside of you to others. You can have a huge impact through social media without prayer, but your impact will be limited to what you can provide. On the contrary, if you will allow prayer to play a significant role in your life, you will have what I would consider an unlimited source of power and influence on your side. Prayer plays a huge role in your online ministry.

On a practical note, you can pray for others online and ask for requests. You can pray through what you post and what you think people need in their lives. You can pray for who you are becoming and who you think you are being molded into. You can pray for others as you reach out and develop relationships. You don’t have to tell people you are praying for them, just do it!

Ok, those are what I call the 3 P’s of Online Ministry. I’m sure there are other important things to think about. What would you add? I would seriously love to hear in the comments. Also, please expand on the 3 P’s in the comments if you like, we would like to learn from you!

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Dec 13 2011

Show Us Your GOODS!

By Chad and has 16 comments.

TheWayItCouldBe.com loves to share the love. It’s time to Show Us Your GOODS- promote your own blog or website! What a great chance to connect with other TheWayItCouldBe.com readers and find some hot new blogs to follow.

The rules: We’ll just be promoting positive sites- promote your blog, business, website, music site, book site, friend’s site, pastor’s site… (you get the idea). This linking software will add the links to this post for others to easily check them out. The sweet deal is that you can promote your stuff and see cool sites from other good people! Show Us Your GOODS!

All you have to do are these 3 things!

1. Fill out your info just like this. Seriously, just like this:
Your Name: Chad Missildine – TheWayItCouldBe Your URL: http://thewayitcouldbe.com.
2. Leave a comment in the comment section and tell us a little about yourself or what you’re promoting.
3. Share “Show Us Your GOODS” w/ others via Twitter & Facebook. It could look like this: Show Us Your GOODS! Promote Your Blog For Free: http://bit.ly/vYQyv7 via @chadmissildine

Don’t be lonely online, Show us your GOODS!
Stumped with your content? Kick Writer’s Block in the Face!

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Dec 08 2011

Twitter Loneliness

By Chad and has 3 comments.

Rewind: I’ve been a social media user for the last couple of years and seen both the benefits and limitations of sharing your life online. We see benefits in terms of the power of connecting with others around the world, and joining in on a global conversation any time of the day! We also see the limitations of social media tools like Facebook and Twitter, with conversation not necessarily always leading to the community we so desperately desire.

It’s When Twitter Leaves You Lonely. Just because I’m in a crowd doesn’t mean I have friends. Just because I’m at the ocean doesn’t mean I know how to swim. I knew people in high school that were at EVERY party, EVERY weekend, and were EVERY bit as lonely as the guy at home. The same applies online.

What is Twitter Loneliness?
Twitter Loneliness is like the guy in the crowd- no real connections. It’s when you are surrounded by conversation, but have no real relationships (instead of Being Relationally Wealthy).

Evidence of Twitter Loneliness
Tons of followers or friends- nothing past surface conversation. Real, legitimate feelings of loneliness for a lack of relationships with real people. There is nothing wrong with chit-chat; sometimes it is totally healthy! However, talking about the weather or where you are going to dinner with a dozen people doesn’t necessarily lead to community.

Is Twitter Loneliness OK?
Sure, if you have people in your offline life that you connect with in any sort of significant relationship. If you don’t have these type of people in your offline life or your online life, you are missing out on life! You’ll be fine and I’m not trying to judge you, I’m just arguing that you will probably not experience the joys of living life in authentic relationship with other people.

How do I combat Twitter loneliness?
Online: Get into some other people’s lives. Don’t feel like you have to follow everyone; you will just spin your wheels and never move an inch. Pick a handful of people to keep track of and start small. Use lists, they work great for me. Ask others about their lives, what they are experiencing, loving, or where they are struggling. This is when social media gets fun! I have a handful of guys I’ve become pretty close with, and we have never met in person or even talked on the phone.

Offline: Go grab coffee with someone, plug in at a church, get involved in your community. Nothing beats a good, honest
relationship! The same principles apply as above: ask about their lives, what they are experiencing, loving, or are frustrated with. Take a risk and trust someone by opening your life up. I promise it’s worth it!

What if I don’t want to be “best friends” with everyone on Facebook or Twitter?
No big deal (you can make your own choices any way)! I follow a ton of people on Facebook and Twitter just to keep track of what is going on in their lives. I also follow several on Twitter that are mentors I may never meet. Nonetheless, these people are not an attempt to replace real community in my life.

Ok, how else can we avoid Twitter Loneliness?? Love to hear your thoughts in the comments! What above is tough for you? Let’s chat!

New to TheWayItCouldBe.com? This is a site promoting cultural impact through personal and spiritual transformation. Post topics include creativity, family, faith, culture, social media and leadership. Feel free to browse around by category. If you dig the site, you can subscribe for free email updates by simply entering your email address in the sidebar out to the right.

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Dec 01 2011

6 Killer Tips For Building Blog Community

By Chad and has 47 comments.

GUEST BLOGGER: Rewind: Today’s post comes from @michaeldperkins who blogs at Untitled.com. Michael Perkins is a dad, a husband, a good friend, and a master side burn grower.

I’m not a professional blogger. And I don’t pretend to be. So when Chad asked me to write a post about how developing a community on a blog, I was blown away. To be honest I kind of panicked because I felt unqualified. I mean, I wrote my blog for nearly six months before I received my first comment.

In no way shape or form is this the only way to develop community. These are just a few of the things that I do because they work for me.

Others: Blogging is about others. It’s about creating a place in which people feel valued and like they matter. You could write the best post ever, but if people think you are a narcissistic jerk that doesn’t care about anyone, they won’t engage in the conversation. In fact, they’ll probably tune you out.

Pay Attention: Many comments are very honest and transparent. Take the time to read each one. And don’t hesitate to to send someone an email or even a DM over Twitter to check on them. Again, it’s about letting people know that they are important. If people feel like they matter they will return.

Ask One Question: I try to ask one specific question at the end of each post. I do this because I want everyone talking about the same the same thing. When the conversation is focused, people are more likely to engage with each other and not just me..

Be Brief: I try to keep my posts short because I want to keep the reader’s attention. I figure that if they have to spend longer than three minutes on my blog, they’ve lost interest. And if they’ve lost interest they’re probably not going to engage in the conversation.

Post In The Evening: I have experimented with different times to schedule a post. But I believe the best time is to post in the evening. I know this is contradictory to what is popular, but it gives people a chance to join in the conversation early and then check back the next morning.

Be Yourself: They’re is only one Michael Hyatt, Jon Acuff, Chad Missildine, Pete Wilson, and Scott Williams. And there is only one of you. Parody is a common thing in blogging, but people appreciate uniqueness. And if you are unique they will return and engage in the conversation.

So there you go. These are the things that I try to do to build community and encourage engagement on my blog.

What do you do to build community on your blog?

TheWayItCouldBe.com is a site promoting cultural impact through personal and spiritual transformation. Post topics include family, faith, leadership and other stuff. Feel free to browse around by category. If you dig the site, you can subscribe for free email updates by simply entering your email address in the sidebar out to the right. – Chad

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Nov 28 2011

8 Ways Twitter Helps You Grow as a Leader

By Chad and has 3 comments.

Rewind: I am a young leader and a young Twitter user, but I’ve learned a ton about what Twitter can do to gelp you grow as a leader. Combined with intentionality and a commitment to personal growth, Twitter can serve as a major growth vehicle for leaders. Here are 8 Ways Twitter Helps You Grow As a Leader:

1. Brevity gives way to intention. 140 characters or less force you to think about what you want to say. Twitter teaches the leader to think before speaking.

2. Clarifying values. You are forced to truly identify what you hold valuable as a leader. Is it authenticity, strength, innovation, creativity? What values do you hold to as a leader? These are sure to influence what you talk about with the rest of the world.

3. Not just words. Words represent so much more than just the letters that comprise them. They point towards ideas and thoughts. They offer a glance deep into the heart. Twitter posts give insight into the leader’s heart and soul.

4. Modeling leadership. Most people in my organization maybe spend a couple of minutes of face time with me on a monthly basis. Twitter allows me to model how (and sometimes how not) to be a leader throughout each hour of each day!

5. Leaders must seize opportunities. The largest investment firms in the world frequently make enormous purchases in a matter of hours or sometimes minutes. They have to know what they are looking for and when to jump on opportunities. Twitter allows leaders to share key thoughts, experiences or insights in real time, seizing the opportunities life presents and immediately sharing them with the world.

6. Expansion of influence. Twitter obviously allows a leader to expand their influence outside of what spaces and places would normally allow.

7. Following other key leaders. I have several mentors that I follow on Twitter that barely even know I exist. Twitter gives me insight into their lives, thoughts and plans, so that I can learn from the best!

8. Building trust. Twitter allows leaders to build trust with followers through consistency and vulnerability. Leaders are seen as real people with real lives. Trust is built through consistent interaction with other followers and openness to the Twitter world!

What other ways does Twitter help leaders grow? We’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments! Dig TheWayItCouldBe.com? Subscribe for email updates at the top of the page. Thanks for stopping by!

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Nov 25 2011

29 Signs You’re Having a Love Affair w Twitter

By Chad and has 3 comments.

This is a post I recently wrote for BigIsTheNewSmall.com. It spread pretty far around the Internet and was even retweeted by 200,000 follower @TweetSmarter on Twitter. Hope you enjoy!

Many of us love Twitter and/or Facebook. But how do we know if we are having a love affair? Well, today is your lucky day! Here are 29 Signs You’re Having A Love Affair with Twitter and/or Faceboook. Enjoy and have fun!

1. You link out to your weblogs on Facebook all day and they each last longer than Lebron James’ one hour contract announcement.

2. You get home late from work at night. For the rest of the family, its dinner time. Not for you baby. It’s secret Twitter and/or Facebook or time!

3. You sit down to grub, update your status. Above the table? Please. That’s for rookies!

4. You update under the table with phone in pocket (like your Tweenager). “Pass the gravy Honey.”

5. Your post is so good, you comment on it yourself (all from secret pocket), “4 Real & True Dat!”

6. “Excuse me spouse, excuse me child, I will be in my study,” you murmur.

7. You sneak off early from dinner for a little S.S.U.D (Secret Status Update Dessert)!

8. You open up your laptop, log online & click on a hidden iTunes folder, entitled, “S.J.F.M. (Something…Just For Me).”

9. Soft Jazz starts to play. It’s Miles Davis. Oh yeah. It’s time…time for some Secret Social Media!

10. You put on your fingerless workout gloves. For working out? No way, for typing silly!

11. You login. With your name? No sir, that’s too easy.

12. Your Twitter name is: @TheReal(insert your name), but you aren’t famous.

13. You hear footsteps down the hall and you slap that laptop shut. Ah snap. Time for bed.

14. You lay down at night and look up. Your FB profile pic is on a poster on the ceiling over your bed. You. Are. The. Man. “Good night hot stuff, ” you whisper. She thinks you’re talking to her.

15. Your lady asks you if she looks fat in her new profile pic and you say under your breath, “Well, Twitter does add 20 pounds.” She doesn’t hear it.

16. She then dims the lights to make her move. You make yours, right of the room and to your phone.

17. She follows you out of the room and starts talking. You’re not listening and you say, “Uh huh.”

18. She busts you for not listening and asks, “You want to sleep on the couch??” You respond, “Yeah….uh huh…yeah.”

19. You wake up that night on the couch (you got your wish) to check for comments. None, Dang.

20. When your wife walks in the next morning you say, “Baby, I’m logged out right now. Can we chat later?”

21. Kids want to play? Too bad. Headphones are in. “Daddy, put your computer down, pwease.” Wha?? You ignore.

22. Time to get dressed. You wear girl’s jeans(but you’re a dude). Oh wait. That just means you’re confused not that you are having an affair with Twitter and/or Facebook, my bad!

23. You throw on a locket with a picture of you, your laptop, and a sunset in the back ground. You look good. Real good.

24. You head out for the day without brushing your teeth. Why? Man, that’s 5 extra minutes of social media time! That’s like 2.5 posts!

25. You are on the way to work. You can drive, update your status, sing and juggle all at the same time. And all while knitting a sweater and avoiding your family!

26. You see the reflection of your new Miami Heat jersey off the window with your number of Twitter followers on the back. There are two words written at the top…

27. Big.

28. Time.

29. Okay , It’s Time Big Time(yeah you, ha). Time for you to add to the list! You know you may be having an affair with Twitter or Facebook when…. Ready, set, go (we’d love to hear your thoughts below in the comments)!

TheWayItCouldBe.com is a site promoting cultural impact through personal and spiritual transformation. Post topics include creativity, family, faith, culture, social media and leadership. Feel free to browse around by category. If you dig the site, you can subscribe for free email updates by simply entering your email address in the sidebar out to the right. – Chad

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Nov 11 2011

Social Media Death Trap

By Chad and has 11 comments.

I love Facebook, Twitter, Blogging (and yes am even on Google+). Social Media has a ton of benefits and endless possibilities, many of which we have featured on TheWayItCouldBe.com. Nonetheless, there are many social media potholes that we can easily fall into.

The biggest “death trap” of all seems to be when we look to these platforms for our validation. We look to our social connections to say whether or not we matter, whether or not we matter to them. Some look to big name celebrities or those with large followings to try to network and be noticed, in the hope that this person’s influence will win them influence. Some spend a TON of time working the field, trying to be noticed. Others simply hope that a friend or two to ten will agree, notice, share or simply acknowledge. The result can be a dangerous death trap that will try to warp your sense of reality. In many ways it can be like the 5 year old that runs around on the playground kicking and screaming, doing anything to get someone else’s attention!

I wonder what would happen if we spent that time being authentic- who we were created to be, instead of who we think others want to see or hear. Not worrying about a following. Not concerned about who thinks what or when or why. What if our sense of validation and identity came not from others, but from whom we know we are called to be- who we were created to be?

What do you think? Is this a struggle for you? What are other social media traps we should look for? What are healthy ways to achieve balance and not be sucked into this social media trap?

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Oct 11 2011

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