Back to the Start: Responsible Food

Do you know where you food comes from and who is producing it? Do you care about your health and about how the food you buy is being produced?

My family and I have recently begun to watch what type of food we by and where we buy it. I watched Food Inc. recently and it made me really think. This Chipotle sponsored video shares the story of a farmer who is sucked into the trap of mass production and turns his organic farm into a factory farm , but realizes his faults, turns back the clock and starts again. Willie Nelson covers a Coldplay song called “Back to the Start.”

What do you think? Have you thought before about what you buy and where you buy it? What tips do you have for those of us who are trying to be more responsible with the purchases that we make?

The Crazy Things We Think!

We think that talking more means having more impact. Often not true.

We think earning more means having a better life. Done that, not true.

We think more and more friends mean more fun. Not always true.

We think more stuff means more contentment. Often not true.

We think more comfort means more happiness. Not always true.

We think more years on earth mean more joy. Not true.

We think the grass is always greener on the other side. Rarely true.

We think we have little control over our situation. Not always true.

We think a lot of things that don’t really line up with reality. We are bombarded with thousands of messages daily that after awhile, we begin to believe and even live by. Giant corporations literally purchase their way into our souls.
I talk to people DAILY who have bought into these “truths” and are miserable and have caused pain to themselves and others as a result.

My challenge for you today is to think about the above “truths” and ask yourself if you have bought into any of them. Admit where you may have gotten off track and ask someone close to you to help you get back to where you were created to be. Comment here if you need someone to hold you up and we will do our best to lift you up!

- Chad

Be Present

Catalyst Director, Brad Lomenick talks about it what it means to “be present”…

So what does Be Present really mean to me?

- Focused and Undivided. Focused on what is right in front of you.

- Engaged In Your Community.

- Focused on Your Family & Marriage. In the mess.

- A Close Community of Accountability & Friendships.

- Leading where you are. Staying in the moment and not losing focus on the here and now.

- Embracing the role and opportunity God has given you right now where God has placed you for this season, vs. focusing on what’s next.

- Creating margin that allows for interruptions and moments of inconvenience, which can be moments when God does the greatest work through us.

- Having consistent connection with your organization, team, and staff.

- Being consumed by Jesus and the presence of the Holy Spirit. Because He is Present.

- Balancing a culture of distraction and consumption with a commitment to solitude and thinking.

- Being vs Doing. What should I do? The tension of a cause driven culture saying do something now vs. the contented state of “being.”

- In the TODAY. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow is on it’s way. But today is the present. Focus on Today.

- It’s about staying. Showing up and not leaving. Having a presence in a place, a location. About context. Connected to an address, neighborhood, city, zip code.

- Where you are. Wherever you are, be all there. It’s our responsibility to embrace what God has put squarely in front of us. Take action right where we are. Being fully present in one place.

Be Present. We get caught up with what happened yesterday and preoccupied with what will happen tomorrow. We live in a constant state of being plugged on, plugged in, status updates, requests, and real time perspective. Is this really the real you though? What if the people in your life knew the real you? What if you stripped back all the layers of fake, and fluff, and façade? What would people see? What would people think? To know this purpose, we must first know Him, Jesus, and living life fully in who He has called us and created us to be.

Let’s strip away all the “stuff” and be real. Aware of what is happening around us, within us, and through us. Be Present.

Originally posted HERE at the awesome Catalyst site for church leaders! Way to go Brad…

Hanging with Prostitutes & Pimps

The other day, my friend from our church and her non-profit organization went out to hang out with prostitutes and pimps.
Seriously.
They cooked out for them and threw a party.
I know because our church bought the burgers and people went out.
They prayed, listened and shared stories.
They watched and saw deep into the eyes of the broken, the shamed and the hopeless.
They provided hope, a glimpse of courage and a bit of understanding.
The gave away Bibles to those who asked for one.
They were a voice.
They built relationships.
They risked their safety.
They hung out with prostitutes and pimps in the 105 degree heat of the day.
While many of us were sitting around sipping $5 lattes and arguing over what the church is really supposed to be doing.

So what do you think about that?

TheWayItCouldBe.com is a site promoting cultural impact through personal and spiritual transformation. Post topics include family, faith, leadership and other areas of life. Feel free to browse around by category. If you dig the site, you can subscribe for free email updates by simply entering your email address in the sidebar out to the right.

Don’t Miss The Middle!

Everyone wants to be THERE not HERE.We naturally look for the day WHEN THIS happens or WHEN THAT takes place. It is easy to lose sight of the importance of The Middle.

Not yesterday. Not tomorrow. Today. Where God has you today. The Middle.

Dads and moms, don’t miss those Middle Years. Leaders, don’t miss that Middle of the road position or Middle ground your organization seems to be stuck in. Don’t miss it! Your character is being shaped. You are becoming who you will be. Don’t miss it! Don’t miss the importance of The Middle.

Why is this so tough? Do help in the comments below… Are you stuck in The Middle? What can you learn during this time in your life?

TheWayItCouldBe.com is a site promoting cultural impact through personal and spiritual transformation. Post topics include family, faith, leadership and other areas of life. Feel free to browse around by category. If you dig the site, you can subscribe for free email updates by simply entering your email address in the sidebar out to the right.

8 Dos & Don’ts of Transformational Leadership

What is transformational leadership? I’m not certain, but it sure sounded better than regular leadership! In my experience, transformational leadership leaves a mark on society. It changes generations in a person’s family. It can alter the course of an individual or an organization’s life. Transformational leadership requires intentionality and sacrifice, but the payoff can be huge! Here are 10 Do’s and Don’ts of Tranformational Leadership:

1. Don’t just give information. Do cast vision every time you speak. Why are you doing what you are doing? How does their piece impact the bigger picture? How can you cast vision instead of dumping info? It’s all about vision!

2. Don’t be passive. Do be bold. If you find yourself saying things like, “Well, it would be nice if you would kindly consider thinking about the thought of maybe considering how you could possibly help me somehow in your spare time think about trying to…..” You get the idea!  Be confident!  Show this confidence in the way you communicate. “Here is where we are going, can I count on you?” Be bold!

3. Don’t just tell the vision. Do inspire a shared vision. Cast vision in such a way that others can call it their own.  How can the passions, talents and dreams of those in your influence or organization contribute to a shared vision?  Can others call the vision their own or is it just a statement posted on the wall?  Use language like we and you. Ask individuals about their dreams, desires, goals in life. Find ways to make the vision a collective or shared vision, not just your own.

4. Don’t be confusing. Do give clarity. Is everyone on your team or in your organization crystal clear about where things are headed? Like an illustrative painting, have you painted a picture with brilliant colors, large brush strokes and compelling passion?  Or is everything gray?  Think about it.  People need to see it in colorful detail, don’t just assume they can.  This is your job!  Be clear with the vision you are laying out.

5. Don’t give all the answers. Do ask the right questions. Recently, I heard a leader say something like, “You need to say this, this and this, and do it exactly like this.”  How much more impacting could the situation have been if that leader would have said, “What do you think we should do?”  How much trust and confidence would that have instilled in that person compared to giving them all the answers?  Good questions will get you a lot further than giving all the answers!

6. Don’t skip the relationship. Do invest in the person. Do you care more about the person you are leading than what you can get out of them? Does this show through the way you relationally invest and connect with them?  This doesn’t mean you have to be best friends.  It does mean that you need to go the extra mile to show that person you are on their side. You exist to help empower them.  Empowerment begins with relationship. Invest!

7. Don’t be a closed book. Do be transparent. People need to see that you’ve blown it, yet have overcome your mistakes. They need to see that you know how to learn when things don’t go the way you planned. This gives them permission to push their own limits and be bold. If they don’t have this permission, they will coast, coast, coast!  Why would they push it if there is no room for mistakes? Lead the way and be transparent.  They will follow suit.

8. Don’t just say it. Do live it. Are you willing to go personally where you are asking others to go? Others will only go where a leader has been personally. Are you truly living it or are you just lip service? Authenticity is pretty easy to sniff out. The unauthentic quickly sound like Charlie Brown’s teacher, “Wahh. Wa. Wahh. Wa. Blah. Blah.” Live it! Your time on this earth is short. Get to it and smoke what you’re selling!

Have you seen any of these eight Dos & Don’ts play themselves out in your life? What are other Dos and Dont’s of leadership?  Please share.

If you dig this post, you may also dig: Why Leadership Ain’t Always SexyLeadership Ain’t a Title: How to Gain Influence Where You Are Now10 Essentials of Online Leadership & a recent guest post at BigIsTheNewSmall.com entitled: Want to Lead? Prove It!

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One Thing Wives Want From Husbands!

I recently interviewed Macy about what women want in their marriage. My questions were an attempt to find out what she was really looking for from me in our marriage, but also an attempt to share my discoveries with you! I shared the interview HERE.

One of the things she mentioned REALLY stood out to me. I asked what women wanted from their husbands and she said one simple word: Leadership

She talked about the husband being the compass for the family, giving direction, setting goals and taking initiative. Women want to see what direction the family is headed in- emotionally, spiritually, financially, relationally.  A common approach that some husbands take is quite opposite. Many men never saw strong leadership from their father as a child, and as a result they don’t think it is their responsibility to do so with their family.

The result is an “I’ll just let the chips fall where they fall” type of marriage, with little or no direction or leadership from the husband. The wife eventually gets frustrated. Sometimes she pushes back with anger trying to get the ball rolling. Kids do whatever they want. This type of leadership or lack of leadership WILL result in collateral damage over time.

Another thing Macy talked about with leadership is for the husband to set expectations for the rest of the family. Questions arise such as: What type of participation is expected? What is the expectation from each family member or what role are they supposed to be playing in the family? Is everyone on their own to pursue their own interests and life or is there a common goal for relating to one another? This one got me thinking about how clear we are with one another about what is expected.

Read about the rest of our conversation HERE.

Have you seen this in marriages? What can happen when their isn’t strong leadership from the husband? What are the effects and better yet, what can men do to provide leadership?

The 1st Church of Everything

Welcome to the 1st Church of Everything. We are all about meeting your needs, whatever they are and whenever they are needed. We don’t want to offend, confront, upset, or ruffle feathers.

What do we believe in? Well, wouldn’t you like to know? That’s depends, what do you believe in? Let’s start there. No seriously, we try not to get into beliefs too much. That is the kind of stuff that cause churches to split.

Why do we exist? To meet everyone’s expectations all the time. We don’t want to step on anyone’s toes or make anyone feel uncomfortable.

What is our focus? Everything from A-Z. You can’t be the 1st Church of Everything, without having ministries for Everything. We have ministries for dogs, frogs and always lots of fog. We’re not that great at any of them, but we are hoping that the number of ministries will make up for it.

We preach the Old Testament, the New Testament and the Newer Testament (a bunch of our ideas that didn’t fit into either Old or New). The world doesn’t care about the issues in the Newer Testament (the one we made up), but we sure do. And we talk about them a lot.

Share the gospel story each week? We find that people like it better when we just show them how to live a good life. We like to save the gospel message for the big Sundays!

We are the 1st Church of Everything. Whatever you want, we’ve got!

We are the “side-effects” of The 1st Church of Everything? Love to hear your thoughts!

TheWayItCouldBe.com is a site promoting cultural impact through personal and spiritual transformation. Post topics include family, faith, leadership and other stuff. Feel free to browse around by category. If you dig the site, you can subscribe for free email updates by simply entering your email address in the sidebar out to the right.

20 Top-Notch Relationship Resources

building-relationships-bloggersAre you single and want to prepare yourself to be the best husband or wife someday?  Do you have a great marriage, but want to make it better? Are you struggling in an area and want to make a change?  Do you just like to read? A few days ago, I put out a few questions asking, “What is your favorite marriage resource, book, author, message and why?”  Below are the responses from helpful friends around the world.

TheWayItCouldBe.com is an effort to encourage cultural change through personal and spiritual transformation. You can subscribe to the RSS feed above (yellow diamond) to receive updates.  Thanks for stopping by! You should also check out Get Others On The Hook to Read a Book for: help getting the most out of your reading, 4 Questions you can ask as you go through a book, ways you can discuss a book or message, finding others to go through the book and tips for learning success. Here are 20 Top-Notch Relationship Resources:

ErikandJenn Trevino- A Weekend to Remember marriage conference
Steven Paul- The Language of Love and The DNA of Relationships by Gary Smalley- Gary provides the most practical principles on making sure that your relationships will last a lifetime.
Trent N Keri Austin- Sacred Marriage. “What if God designed marriage to make us Holy not Happy.”
Aaron Tungate- I second Sacred Marriage.
Kyle Cretsinger- His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage by Willard F. Harley Jr.
Teresa Diseker- Created to Be His Help Meet, can’t remember the author.
Yvonne Wright- The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman.
Tina Crowder- 7 Principles for Making a Marriage Work by John Gottmann…excellent book.
Stacia Neeley- His Needs/Her Needs by Harley…but you’ll have to customize it to your needs. I discovered that in two areas, I am a guy -ha!
Darin Hedrick- Love and Respect, Emerson Eggerich Great book and web-site!!
Anita Gay Soler- Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas. Subtitle: “What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than make us happy?” It’s an awesome book. Totally in keeping with the concept of God is our One, our spouse is our Two.
Greg Pirtle- www.simplemarriage.net – My friend Corey Allan is a great resource and has a very honest and healthy approach.
Angela Nevius Dormer- Sacred Marriage by Thomas, Five Love Languages by Chapman, sheet music by Leman
Misty Stanger Wooldridge- The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
CourtneyCherest- @PastorMark’s Peasant Princess series and@stevenfurtick’s Visionary Love, Dream Sex series. Both Song of Solomon. Great
Linn Graves- Mine is The Love Dare by Stephen&Alex Kendrick :)
Jay Greentree- @Linn_Graves @chadmissildineMine is The Love Dare by Stephen&Alex Kendrick :) // The Love Dare and Fireproof The Movie
CourtneyCherest- you’re welcome. Also, Piper’s book This Momentary Marriage
I’ll add three- Focus on the Family’s website, Craig Groeschel’s Message Series The Vow and Once Upon a Marriage

What other favorite resources do you have for relationships or marriage?


Tiny Missildine Drummer

I think we’ve got a tiny drummer on our hands, what do you think??

TheWayItCouldBe.com is a site promoting cultural impact through personal and spiritual transformation. Post topics include family, faith, leadership and other stuff. Feel free to browse around by category. If you dig the site, you can subscribe for free email updates by simply entering your email address in the sidebar out to the right.