Re-post: Marriage is funny and there are lots of things husbands just don’t understand (how the pillows on the bed multiply every year, why you can’t use the towels hanging in the bath room, etc.). To try to get into my wife‘s head and perhaps provide some perspective for the rest of us guys(especially the Hopeless Husbands), I asked her if I could interview her for this blog. The result was 5 Things Every Wife Wants From Her Husband. Here…we…go…

Me: Can I ask you some questions about what wives want from husbands?
Macy: Are you asking for your blog or for your own benefit?
Me: Um…for the blog I guess. But I’m curious too!
Macy: Ok.
Me: Ok, what do wives really want from their husbands?

Attention
Macy: Attention
Me: Yes, go on (Ron Burgandy voice from Anchorman)
Macy: Yes, focused attention, emotional attention. An equal amount or more of what’s given to social media (hint for me). Not just being physically there, but emotionally there. Being physically there and not emotionally there is almost worse than being there all together.
Me: Ok, that was a good one, what else?

Do things around the house
Macy: Do things around the house.
Me: What kind of things around the house?
Macy: Anything. As a way of showing you appreciate who she is and what she does on a regular basis. Helping her on the things she does is just a part . Then doing things that are man things- like mowing and stuff.
Me: And squashing bugs?
Macy: Yeah women take a lot of pride in their home and want husbands to respect that. Even things like you bringing me coffee and cereal in bed. That is my love language. No matter how small things are.
Me (in my head): Score!

Leadership
Me: Ok, what else do wives want besides attention and doing things around the house?
Macy: Leadership- being the compass for the family as a whole- giving direction, setting goals, initiative, instead of letting the chips fall wherever. Wives want husbands to know what direction they want their family to go. They want to be heading towards that direction. Also, wives want husbands to be setting expectations for the family, for the kids- giving everyone an idea of what you expect from them.
Me: Ok, check. Wives want leadership from their husbands. What else?

To be spoiled every now and then
Macy: To be spoiled every now and then.
Me: Why is that important?
Macy: Because it makes her feel special and loved- that she’s worthy of being spoiled. A lot of guys do special stuff when dating, then when they are married they don’t do anything out of the norm. Being spoiled just makes her feel special. It doesn’t have to be expensive, just something with put thought into it.
Me: Like what?
Macy: Planning a special day with the two of you or with the family, or just planning special just for her to do alone.
Me: Ok, thanks for the tip. What else do wives want from their husbands?

Security
Macy: Security
Me: Like financial security?
Macy: Yeah, but really just knowing that you’ll always be there.
Me: Got it, anything else?
Macy: I think in a way it ties together with leadership. In the way that she knows the husband has things under control. The women needs to know he will always be there, regardless of how things go.
Me: What is the difference when she has that trust?
Macy: When the man is secure in himself, that gives the woman a sense of security. Like when he knows who he is. Me: Yes go on (again Ron Burgandy voice)
Macy: Well if he doesn’t know who he is or where he is headed, it gives her a feeling of insecurity. There have been times in our lives, where you didn’t know what you would be doing- but you knew who you were- a man under the direction of God. I was secure in the fact that you weren’t going to do anything outside the will of God.
Me: Like when?
Macy: I knew the day you called me and said you were dropping out of seminary that our life together was going look a lot different than what I had grown up with (a dad that worked for the same company his whole life). But still, I knew you would follow the direction of God. That is security.

Other stuff
Me: Ok, thanks these are great.
Macy: Wait, I have one more.
Me: But the post is 5 things, not 6.
Macy: Listening is always a good thing…. it’s pretty important.
Me: What did you say?
Macy: Hahaha
Me: I’ve gotten better at listening though right?
Macy: Sometimes…

Me: Ok, last request- can you post this on your Facebook page in the morning?
Macy: That depends how good it is. I only post things I believe in…

Ok ladies, your turn- is Macy on target? Which of these can you elaborate on? What are other things that wives want from their husband? Love to hear your thoughts in the comments below!