I recently interviewed Macy about what women want in their marriage. My questions were an attempt to find out what she was really looking for from me in our marriage, but also an attempt to share my discoveries with you! I shared the interview HERE.

One of the things she mentioned REALLY stood out to me. I asked what women wanted from their husbands and she said one simple word: Leadership

She talked about the husband being the compass for the family, giving direction, setting goals and taking initiative. Women want to see what direction the family is headed in- emotionally, spiritually, financially, relationally.  A common approach that some husbands take is quite opposite. Many men never saw strong leadership from their father as a child, and as a result they don’t think it is their responsibility to do so with their family.

The result is an “I’ll just let the chips fall where they fall” type of marriage, with little or no direction or leadership from the husband. The wife eventually gets frustrated. Sometimes she pushes back with anger trying to get the ball rolling. Kids do whatever they want. This type of leadership or lack of leadership WILL result in collateral damage over time.

Another thing Macy talked about with leadership is for the husband to set expectations for the rest of the family. Questions arise such as: What type of participation is expected? What is the expectation from each family member or what role are they supposed to be playing in the family? Is everyone on their own to pursue their own interests and life or is there a common goal for relating to one another? This one got me thinking about how clear we are with one another about what is expected.

Read about the rest of our conversation HERE.

Have you seen this in marriages? What can happen when their isn’t strong leadership from the husband? What are the effects and better yet, what can men do to provide leadership?